I want to know something. I want your input.
What is the key to your personal happiness?
I don't mean like your house, your dog. Those are wonderful I'm sure. I mean what is the concept in your life that creates sustainable happiness in you?
Is it the acceptance that we are all ridiculous and flawed? The shirking of perfection and the need to be some parametered being?
Is it maybe the letting go of what others think of you? The ability to look in the mirror and not just like who you see, but accept that some days you don't?
Is it all the things surrounding you that takes you away from your inner voices that might be too critical?
What is your secret formula?
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
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18 comments:
Knowing the absolutely ludicrous odds that I am here at all...
I wake up everyday and think- "Is this some kind of JOKE?"
That makes me start the day with a smile on my face...
That's a really, really good question. I shall have to mull this over for a while.
I'd say that for me it's yoga. Every day. It calms me, centers me, and makes my body feel happy. Yoga gives me fuel to get through each day. And all that other stuff like knowing we're flawed, being present, not being attached to the material...
I'm partially with Scott. What I haven't figured out is if we're the joke or the punchline. ;-)
Unfortuantely, I get through most days by sheer force of will.
i have to agree with both scott and liv. I know it's all ridiculous, and i exercise.
Oh, and sex.
Scott, this is a good one. Remembering how lucky we are to be alive. I have often wondered why people in wartorn countries, or famine ravaged areas of the world continue to have children. Perhaps this is the answer- they recognize how lucky they are just to be here.
Sergei, ha ha made you think. J/k, like you don't do that plenty anyways. Looking forward to your mulled answer though.
Liv, would you say that the 'centering' that yoga does for you brings to the realizations that we're flawed, need to be present and not attached to the material and this connection is then the fuel that yoga is providing?
Gordo, this is how I feel - force of will. But I want to stop feeling like I have to force my way through life. I'd really like to find peace enough to feel sustainably happy. To wake up and smile as Scott puts it.
Meno, I've always enjoyed that you put effort (or it seems you do) into being silly on a regular basis. I think this helps a person's outlook. I'm working on this part. Oh and sex. :-)
I wish I knew, truly.
Knowing that the world is so much bigger than I am and must things that happen are not personal. Actually that's my key to being content and calm.
Happiness is a little more illusive and highly dependent upon utterly ridiculous things. I don't have a formula.
I finally had to learn that I was getting upset over things over which I had no control. When I started to sort out and deal with only the things I could control my mood improved a great deal, and getting out of bed was a lot easier in the mornings.
U-U, if you ever find out, let me know, I'll do the same.
Patches, you make a distinction between calm and content and happiness and then mention that happiness depends on ridiculous things. I want more info. If content and happy are not the same (I see a distinction) then what are these ridiculous things we need? Do you think that being content and accepting that contentment is best could be the subtle road to true happiness?
irrelephant, hmmm. Perhaps a good exercise in mood alteration would be to then start markedly noting the things I cannot control? I love lists, I see a list coming.
Maggie, I've been doing yoga for so long that I walk to my mat knowing "the realizations that we're flawed, need to be present and not attached to the material" full well. I think that the physical practice is what keeps me sane enough to implement these ideas. I also think that the practice helps me remember that although I am keenly aware of my flaws, I need to practice nonviolence against myself.
Mostly, I think that yoga gives me a peaceful purpose in a world that feels very scattered and intense.
My secret is stimulation of the senses. Seriously.
I pull new recipes each week off the internet so that I'm never eating the same things. I try to read and learn as much as possible (about anything). This week it's the letterpress. I buy music without listening to it first. I buy new perfume at least once every three months. At least once every two months I try to find something local to do that I've never done before.
That's been my secret for the last eight years. Until this year. This year nothing has kept me happy. I think the forces are working against me. Hopefully next year will be better again. *Sigh*
Mine is the simplest ever...it is measured by the joy of doing what I'm doing...be that working with kids, being with my husband and /or friends, writing, walking, canoeing, reflecting, dreaming...and appreciating that I still have some healthy days and that I am here doing those simple things.
This one is easy to write if you are happy and at peace. I am still mulling this one over as it is so difficult to actually put into words.
It's all a state of mind.
Heaven is a state of mind.
Everything's a state of mind.
And if I go, then state on my
tombstone that I'm doin' fine...
Learning. When my synapses are firing I'm one happy camper. Writing. When I get a sentence _right_ I float on it the rest of the day.
Having the freedom to do both, that's what REALLY makes me happy.
Liv, thank you for giving more insight. There is something about the connection of mind and body on so many levels. Focusing on one and not the other seems to be a detriment. An active mind and an exercised body work in unison to keep a person from fragmenting too much into the negative I think. My biggest problem is balancing the two. I get focused in on one and leave the other behind. Never works well that way.
Tink, its a wonderful way to keep things fresh. And I imagine it would work most the time. But you have had an exceptionally busy and stressful year. Don't worry, it will pull back together. In the meantime, go buy some perfume.
MOI, this is a great example of being present. Not allowing the worrysome or stressful thinking to creep in, but to remain always focused on the here and now and seeing the positive in it. It is a tough habit to establish - you have done well.
Schmoopie, it is hard to pin down. Maybe it is an ever changing formula - dealing with whatever life is giving you at the moment might take different tactical moves.
D-Man, ever the poet.
Nancy, for a mom at home, you hit an important nail smack on the head: having the freedom to do those things which keep your mind popping and your feet on clouds. I constantly remind myself that these early years pass all too soon and then I will have time to spare and no little feet under me begging for kisses.
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